Jake (Fanon)
Jake is the owner and manager of Bake Stars, a bake store staffed by Pepper Jackie and Sweet T, a seemingly normal high schooler who is secretly a highly retarded gang boss. Appearance Jake wears a long sleeved white shirt with a blue T-shirt over it. He stole his grey pants from Wal-Mart and bought some Yeezys after his weed dispensary started skyrocketing. Biography He is indirectly responsible for the Columbine High School massacre, a devastating school shooting that took place on April 20th, 1999. He sold firearms to the prospecting shooters, but regretted it due to his honorable nature as a CBD oil supplier. His age is unknown, but he is predicted to be around 420,069 or 57 years old. He is distantly related to the deceased fascist Italian leader, Benito Mussolini. Jake tried to kill Sweet T but failed, and was personally put down by Sweet T. The Boss proceeded to shoot out all the windows and lights while blasting Chocolate Rain by Tay Zonday in the McDonalds that Jake was eating in, and shot out his kneecaps in the process. Sweet T then finished him off with his signature weapon, a shortsword-sized frozen mackerel. As a result, he died and became the antihero of an isekai anime. Jake was reanimated as a zombie and got cloned twice. One was to stay in this universe and the other went to the parallel iready universe where he took the place of the ascended Jake. The Jake of this universe continued on the drug dealer path, and was the reason behind Trumps election and his assasination. Jake got revenge on Sweet T by snorting a bunch of cocaine and beating Sweet T with a frozen cod. A frozen fish battle took place in which Sweet T became victorious and burnt Jakes body. A cult based on Jake (which calls itself the CTL Cult) has been made and is trying to bring their god back to life. Alternate Universe In the parallel universe, Jake was revived at the cost of his power being greatly reduced. In order to regain his power, Jake went on a SJW destroying campaign with his ally Ben Shapiro and as a result got his genitals cut off by Pepper Jackie. On a quest to get his balls back Jake caused 9/11 by paying Mohamed Atta to run the planes into the buildings. After his skills at terrorism and trickery were seen, he was invited to join the Bake Stars, a terrorist group run by Sweet T and Pepper Jackie. Jake got over his anger at PJ and together they were responsible for the Australian bush fires, the assassination of Kennedy, and the 1939 invasion of Poland by the Third Reich. Jake was later wrongly jailed for saying the N Word without a pass, despite being black. This caused him to go insane and he started a riot in which he killed or maimed everyone in the prison. He escaped and went back to bake stars where he started to bake to avoid suspicion. He then made a bargain with the devil to destroy any country he didn't like. He lost his soul but he destroyed Europe, China, Germany, and everything else except Russia where he had a base. See The battle of Russia for more information on Jake’s mad escapades. To summarize the Battle of Russia, Jake got revenge on Sweet T by snorting a bunch of cocaine and beating Sweet T with a frozen cod. A frozen fish battle took place in which Sweet T was slain by Jake, but God then beat him 10,000 light years into a black hole with a massive frozen great white. A cult based on Jake (which calls itself the CTL Cult) has been made and is trying to bring their god back to life. Assassination Attempt On April 12, 1977 (in the alternate universe), Jake was seen on Main Street in New York City. A suspicious stranger that was following him pulled out a Mk II NATO 7.62 mm AR, and shot Jake 3 times in the abdomen. Every shot penetrated his clothing and hit his stomach, liver, and small intestine. Jake spent 2 months recovering in a nearby hospital, and went on to kill 19 civilians as "revenge" for the man that almost took his life. Accomplishments *Indirectly caused the Columbine shooting *Became a successful CBD oil supplier *Attempted to kill Sweet T, but failed and was sent to an alternate universe *Roasted a ton of SJWs with Ben Shapiro *Caused 9/11 in the alternate universe *Caused the Australian bush fires of 2019, JFK's assassination, and the 1939 invasion of Poland in the alternate universe *Caused a prison riot *Sold his soul to reduce all of Earth to ruins except for Russia in the alternate universe *Hired a mercenary to take out Archduke Franz Ferdinand *Founded the band Ween Likes *Sweet T (sometimes) *Weed *His N word pass *Ben Shapiro *Benito Mussolini *McDonalds *Moe anime *Shrek *Pepper Jackie (sometimes) *coke *Mohamed Atta *69420 Dislikes *Sweet T (sometimes *Not having his N word pass *Lord Farquaad Category:After years of being a sex offender Jake decided to cut his old way and become a molester.A man who sells child porn and we decided to give him a noble piece prize for it. Category:Males